Blogger buddy Interview: SassyAssy

Comedy, so far, has treated me well. And I am ever-fortunate for this blog. Not only has it given me the opportunity to actively share my comedic thoughts and goals with readers, but it has also allowed me to meet and interact with new blogger friends. Over the past few weeks, some of my blogger buddies have agreed to be interviewed about themselves and their blogs, and ideally how comedy plays a role in either or both.

This is the first of many interviews to come. Today we get a chance to chat with SassyAssy of the blog, A Glitter Whore Goes Shopping. (Yeah, what a daring name!) Read on to find out more about her:

Quest: Where are you from originally? Born, raised, etc.

I was born in New Jersey, but moved to the south when I was 3. I tend to have a split personality--one for the north and one for the south. It really shows in my accent.

Quest: You said "the south," as in "the southern United States" or "the southern Hemisphere," (i.e. Australia, Antarctica, etc.)

SassyAssy: The Southern United States

Quest: Explain the title of your blog: A Glitter Whore Goes Shopping.

SassyAssy: I worked in retail for a brief while right before I started this blog and I worked with several gay men. They loved my sense of style and would tease me about all my jewelry and girly accessories. They nicknamed me the Glitter Whore.

Quest: What is your profession? What do you do outside of blogging, to pay the bills?

SassyAssy: I am an accountant and entrepreneur to pay the bills.

Quest: When did the blogging bug bite? Why blogging? Why post it to the public?

SassyAssy: The blogging bug hit during the last failing years of my marriage in 2004. I had a friend who blogged and she recommended it as a way to relieve the stress. My ex had violated my privacy by reading my handwritten journal, so I was without that. I assumed an online identity and began to write.

I really did not think about blogging to the public as I never thought anyone but my friend would be interested enough to read it. I developed a small band of loyal readers. Eventually, I stopped writing to my original blog as the marriage went into rapid decline. On the day I moved into my apartment when I separated from the ex, I started up my current blog and I let my loyal readers know.


Quest: In relationships, do you eventually want something serious?

SassyAssy: I am not sure that I will ever marry again, but I do want a serious relationship with the right person.

Quest: Do you feel humor is necessary for a healthy and successful marriage?

SassyAssy: Humor is an essential ingredient for a healthy & successful life period!

Quest: What, to you, does a healthy and successful marriage consist of?

SassyAssy: Good communication, the ability to laugh at ourself and our mate, common interests to share as well not-so-common interests--interests which are independent of one another, to keep it fresh.

Quest: What do you want to see in the next relationship?

Well, I want love (of course) and fidelity and really awesome sex because all three of those things were missing in the marriage. I want someone who supports my career and education goals (I work for myself and I am beginning a Masters program) and someone who loves to travel.


Quest: Now your blog is mainly about your newfound singledom, being a "Sex in the City" type of gal in the south. What do you want to say to your female readers? What are communicating to the men?

SassyAssy: I don't know that I have a singular message to either men or women. I guess the bottom line is a person can survive [a divorce] by starting over. A person can have fun getting back into the dating scene. Life is an adventure to experience-- enjoy it!

Quest: In one of your posts you state, "Mama always said that a sense of humor was worth its weight in gold and thank god I have that in spades!" Care to elaborate on Mama's message?

SassyAssy: My mama said a sense of humor was necessary to keep your sanity--Amen to that!

Quest: You mentioned a dance partner in your very first post and throughout the blog. Dancing seems to be a major part of your life. Why dancing?

SassyAssy: I love to dance for fun. I dance as much as I can and sometimes I dance in ballroom competitions.

Quest: My favorite suggestion on your blog about marriage is Maybe we are not meant to be with just one person...marriage should have the option to be renewed at the end of each year. What are really trying to say about marriage?

SassyAssy: It just seems to me that marriage goes down hill once you get to know someone very well--once you live with them day in and day out. If you could just renew your vows like a lease, I think life would be so much simpler and maybe the marriage would not be taken for granted. I am certainly no expert though.

Quest: I love this quote on your blog, "I love a man who can make me laugh till I cry" Perhaps that's the key-- making sure somehow, somewhere you have comedy in your life.

SassyAssy: Absolutely!!!


Quest: Would you say that you're the funniest of your friends? Do you keep them in stitches?

SassyAssy: Most of my friends have a great sense of humor and I think we take turns being the funniest depending on the circumstances. My friends do say they call me to be cheered up because I do have such a dry, off-the-wall sense of humor. I do keep them in stitches.

Quest: Have you ever considered a career or small stint in standup comedy? I know I keep dropping hints in your comments section on your blog.

SassyAssy: I don't think I could do stand up....I am not sure I would be so humorous on demand.

Quest: Were you a class clown growing up? The life of the party?

SassyAssy: I have been a smart-ass my entire life. Sometimes I am the life of the party, but it really depends on the occasion and whether something strikes me as funny. Once I get on a roll, I can't stop.

Quest: Shopping through the personals for a mate seems a bit daunting, but you handle it with amazing dexterity. Do you recommend online dating? What advice do you have for anyone about to venture into online dating?

SassyAssy: If it weren't for online dating, I would not have gone on a single date in the last year. It is the only place I have met men. I am careful when I arrange to meet them and I always talk to them beforehand to get my comfort level. I also have a "devil-may-care" attitude. I figure you don't know about someone until you meet them face to face. I don't have a lot invested at that point so it doesn't matter if it is a bad date or not.

Quest: So of the many men that answer your ads, what numbers (percentage / ratio-wise) actually make it on a date with you?

SassyAssy: 1 out of 10

Quest: Do you think you need to have a sense of humor to enter the dating scene?

SassyAssy: YES! You cannot take the dating scene too seriously. I think people, especially women, take it too seriously and they end up being bitterly disappointed. I enjoy going on dates because it provides me with humorous stories to tell on my blog. I know the date is a dud if I cannot find a single thing to make fun of afterward.

Quest: On your blog you have a very tongue-in-cheek tribute to the men you dated whom didn't make the cut--"The Graveyard of Men". Explain that.

SassyAssy: I walked out of my apartment last Halloween and the neighbor had set up a mock graveyard as decoration for a party. I took a picture of it for some reason and then decided to make my own graveyard of men. I never use the real name of someone I date on my site. I always have a nickname for each man I go out with. I decided to post their name on a headstone as I kicked them to the curb. It was easier for people to keep up with the sometimes dizzying pace of my dating at a glance.

Quest: Any chance of bringing them back from the dead? Have any resurfaced?

SassyAssy: I have only resurrected one of them back from the dead for a brief blip in time. I won't make that mistake again. Several of them would like second chances, but once I move on, I keep on going. We broke up for a reason. I remember always keep that reason in mind.

Quest: I am disappointed to see that In your list of What you want in a man, "Excellent sense of humor," is only #8 on the list? Number #8?!?! For shame!

SassyAssy: I don't remember that list, but maybe I hadn't reached my quota of mojitos when I wrote it. Some men--no matter how funny--just ain't boyfriend material. One of the graveyard guys (Biker Dude) could make me laugh until I cried, but he just wasn't longterm material. I am guessing I wrote that list right after he broke up with me.

Quest: And good comedic dating stories that you'd like to fill us in on?

SassyAssy: My most recent dating disaster: I met Roberto online and we chatted via IM and phone. He was nice looking and he seemed to have a terrific personality. I drove 1.5 hours to meet him (I live in the south so that is not a long time to drive in southern time). He pulled up in a Jag and he was nice looking and very charming. He told me had a foot fetish as he tried to caress my toes in their sparkly high heels while we sat in Starbucks. I started to get some weird vibes, but despite this I went to dinner with him. When dinner was over I broke the news that I just did not think I wanted to see him again. He was not happy, but he seemed like he accepted this.
A few weeks later I get an IM from him telling me he wants to get to know me. My response: WHAT????

I typed back "Roberto, you already know me. We went on a date. I told you I would not go out with you again and you told me you were never speaking to me again." He typed back "I know you????"

Yeah, I am quite the psycho-magnet...always have been and I believe I always will be. Something about me brings the inner psycho out in men and women. I have been stalked by both. Seems some women really really want to be my best friend and don't take no for an answer.

Quest: Who is the latest squeeze in your life?

SassyAssy: I am currently seeing someone--a biologist. He has been a loyal fan since my first blog and when he broke up with his girlfriend this spring we finally met in person and have been seeing each other ever since. Obviously, I don't spend a lot of time talking about that since it is sooo awkward with him reading every word I type. It does make for some comedy as he is very scientific in his approach to life and I am more artistic in mine. He is very much a loner and I am a party person.

Quest: What activities are currently going on presently in your life? You earned your BBA, (which is the equivalent of a BA in the US). What are you up to next?

SassyAssy: I am very busy getting my 2nd business (also an accounting business but with a partner) off the ground. I just finished my BA in Business (or BBA) and I am getting ready to start my Masters in Forensic Accounting. I will be an accounting detective...I am already envisioning the new tv series: CSI: Accounting.

Thanks to SassyAssy for her riveting yet comedic portrayal of the dating scene in the south. Be sure to check out more of her dating antics on her blog.

SassyAssy blogs at: http://a-glitter-whore-goes-shopping.blogspot.com/

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