The Politics of Open Mics in New York City

So, Yes, I have been slacking in the posting department. I know you all are so very expectant of what I've been doing over the past week/weekend--teeming with anticipation! And I'll have you know that I've been doing NOTHING, absolute zero-- as it relates to comedy.

...I don't want the money, I just want the stagetime...

I have been investigating getting a portable PA system to perform in the streets/subway, to up my comedy ante. Although, I heard you need to have a Tax ID # in order to perform underground or publicly for that matter. I don't want the money. I just want the stagetime!

Let me explain why I've come to this conclusion. I need to be onstage more, less to do with joke telling, and more to do with having a mic in my hand and speaking into it. Really, I just need to get comfortable walking and talking, formally!

These open mics cost money, which I'm not sure I've mentioned before. But I will do so now. Let's get behind the 'Politics of Open mics in NYC': Owners and GMs (general managers) are hip to the scene. They know these scrap comics are bad at what they do, but are desperate enough to perform anywhere. There's a joke about setting up a mic stand in an alley, and comics will flock (without any advertising.)

Let me tell you who's not doing a great job in advertising department: The Comedy Clubs. Well, maybe that's a bit farfetched. But the Comedy Boom of the 90s is long gone. Where's the next Seinfeld, Ellen DeGeneres, Chris Rock, or Dave Chappelle? (I think Dave Chappelle was an aberration/fluke. Comedy was dying and he gave it its last few breaths. He and John Mayer.) So comedy in general has been in a bear market, and hence comedy club owners feel they charge for open mics. Open mics are now at least $5 - $7 or a one to two drink minimum. I'm not a miser. I know these venues (comedy clubs, restaurants, etc.) need to remain afloat as a business. So why not take it out on some wanna-be comic, who's got nothing better to do with his money/time? Good rationale. But this "pay for stagetime" thing has only been a recent occurrence--within the last 2 - 4 years.

So I've decided to "take it to the streets." I'll let you know how this progresses. I'll try and record the audio. I have no idea how I'm going to do that. But where there's a will there's a way!

Law school stuff has been dominating the agenda, and much to my surprise it's actually fun to do. Yes, I said it. LSAT review is actually FUN! I know, I know. I shouldn't be writing that. But my mind is one that likes to take apart puzzles and figure out crazy clues and put them back together again.

And I'll have you know, lawyers and standup comedians have a lot in common. The assembling of an argument and the assembling of a joke is quite the same. There's a beat to it--a rhythm, if you will. Logic is well-represented in both media.

Cool occurrences in the past week:

I FINALLY got to see Demetri Martin perform at ITU last Wednesday. Super cool. I literally swooned. I didn't know swooning was something that occurred outside of cheesy 50s movies. (*In the voice of a high school teenager with heart throb-itis*) "He's so witty and so smart!"

Anyway, it's something I've been waiting to see for awhile--his standup set. It's the first time live since 2005! (I didn't mean for that to rhyme.) Anyway, it was well worth the wait!

I also saw Mr. Dave Attell hanging out yesterday. He wasn't actually hanging out. He was probably making some very important phone call to his manager. I happened to see him and wave hello. He sort of did the "I-have-no-idea-who-you-are" grimacing smile. But I couldn't resist! It was cool. I feel like all these random sightings are a sign that I should keep going and simultaneously, like I'm being invited into a cool community.

~ Lucy

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Comedy Run #1, Part 2

...get a tape recorder...

A lot happened this past Wednesday night. And it all happened within a span of 5 hours. The best thing about these unplanned nights is that, well, they're unplanned. Everything is spontaneous and everything falls into place, as if the universe was playing dominoes with events in my life.

I think the proper term is: Serendipity!

Yes! I got to meet Mike Birbiglia¹ (nickname: Birbigs) as I popped out of the "L" Train on my way to Invite them Up [ITU], which I attended back in '05. I originally went to see Demetri Martin² whom I had only caught a brief glimpse of on Conan O'Brien. That night was also serendipitous. I had gotten home late night and saw Demetri's set on Conan, then quickly did Google/MySpace search. I then found that he was performing at this ITU gala at Bowery Ballroom. A ticket was purchased! Bonus! And that's the story of how I got to ask Demetri Martin, "How do you get started in comedy?" He said, "Get a tape recorder and record your voice. Practice listening to your voice." That's probably not an exact quote, but he definitely said "get a tape recorder."

Let's start at the beginning:

6:30 pm - "C" and I met up at Starbux. And then we headed over to the original open mic, which C was signed up to perform. Again, very eventful and educational. [See post on Comedy Run #1]

8:30pm - C mentions ITU, a more established stand up night.

Instantly, I'm game!

So then we head over to the venue.

9:05pm - and it's a packed house.

Rififi's is a relatively small venue. And when we the get there the staff (usually interns for the club) are greet us and mention that the show kinda already started and that we should hang back before we pay. (i.e. we might not get in.) Yes, it's that popular.

Louis CK is on stage. (We, C and I, have the ability to peak through the French doors, dividing the non-paying from the paying guests.) By now, I'm salivating on the post-modern French doors. By the way, did I tell you that it was only $5 to enter?³

Why am I salivating? Because I have a pseudo-crush on Louis CK, and if he's anything like the persona he presents on stage/in his specials, then like Linda Richman "I'm buttah!" I definitely have a thing for assholes, but assholes from a distance. I'm not sub or anything. But maybe there's something to women mistaking assholishness for confidence. If you watch his standup Louis isn't confident either. He's just frustrated and he lets it rip on stage.

I'm not really supposed to have a crush on him, because he's married and has a kid. So that's why I say pseudo-crush, because it's there, but I could end it anytime and be brought back to the world of adulthood and maturity as I see fit.

I also have a mild crush on Demetri Martin, which I can go in to later.⁴

Okay, so how did this night end up?

C had gone out late the night drinking with some friends from work and she began to get weary and hungry. So we opted for pizza, nearby pizza. I paid, because, she had paid for the entrance to her performance earlier on?

Confused? Well, most beginning comics have to pay for their time on stage. Consider it "paying your dues," literally. To me that's a lot easier and less frustrating than kissing actual ass.

So typically, the bar/venue asks that you not only bring an audience member but to also have either you or that audience member pay for a drink (i.e. 1 drink or 2 drink minimum). Understandable. It's a business and it's gotta survive!

Back to the pizzeria: We sat, and ate, and chatted up the counter-people. It was all well an good. C wanted to go home still, and there was no way I was going to miss out on Birbigs performance.

11:15pm - Back to Rififi's - Birbigs was already on stage. I got to catch the last 5 jokes. He was good! He's a pro! Of course, he is.

So the he was the last performance. And Mr. Eugene Mirman closed out the night as emcee. He mentioned we should hang and there would be music. There was cool indie rocker music and I did hang. I ended up chatting Eugene's girlfriend[gf]. She was kind to listen me rattle off my law school woes. And she also encouraged my pursuit in my comedy career. She was super congenial. I also met her filmmaker friend. Also very kind. Kind enough to listen to me rant/complain/whine about what I should do in my law school/comedy crossroad.

And then I chatted up an intern/staff member at Rififi's. He described the usual clientèle and what takes place throughout the week. Very Informative.

As I prepped to leave, because I knew I was wearing out my welcome,

"Are you going to be coming often?" he asked.

I'm pretty sure he just wanted to ensure he could bet on good company that evening. No prob. I will be back.

At 11:55pm, I stepped out into the pavement, in 40 degree weather. The streets wet from the off-and-on drizzling rain and a very conscious thought occurred to me. I acknowledged that it was a perfect night. One of those nights that you want to preserve and place in a glass bottle, like a firefly. But you know you have no way of holding on to it to relive it. Eventually, the firefly will die.

You just have to let it be--a perfect, fulfilling moment. No photograph or blog entry can bring it back. Just let it be. Just try and remember as it was--a perfect NY night. My fear was that I would forget, that feeling, that moment, that perfect high. And I'm sorry to say, it has faded. The only way, as I see it, to bring it back, is to get on stage, and create it again and again.

~ Lucy

¹Mike Birbiglia [Official Site|MySpace|Wikipedia] [Return to Entry]

²Demetri Martin [Official Site|MySpace|Wikipedia] [Return to Entry]

³ People if you aren't catching my drift, comedy shows are waaayy cheaper than any movie, concert, or theatre show and just as entertaining! And sometimes, that admission gets you a free drink! Double-bonus! I don't even drink and I know that's a a good deal![Return to Entry]

⁴This crush would not classify as pseudo. This crush is quite real. But again, I reserve the right to renege on my crushes, mainly because once reality sets in, crushes tend to fade.

"Why even have crushes?" you ask. "They pose a function of disuse/misuse."

Oh, so true, dear blog reader. I agree. They're sort of a waste of time. In fact, they almost never lead to anything. (This could perhaps be fodder for a comic routine.)

Having crushes on people I would deem fellow comics could be detrimental to my career. Oh, this could prove difficult.[Return to Entry]

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