2) Their inattention to style-- closer to torn and tattered clothing
3) They either carry a notebook or a voice recorder.
4) Their relentless notetaking and holding long conversations with themselves.
5) Their inability to laugh--at anything.
6) Their constant scrutiny of other jokes.
7) Their reclusive nature, ducking behind corners when strangers approach.
8) Their sad story about their burdensome "forever-the-black-sheep" life.
9) Their afflictions
10) Their screwball affectations which then become afflictions (see above).
Top 11th way: Their obsessive list-making.
edit: this only applies to male comics.
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Friday, October 12, 2007
Top 10 Ways to Spot a Comedian
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Homeless Comedy - "Man, you had to be there!"
So I live in "The Big Apple". Now being a New Yorker, you must know that it's become commonplace, even expected, that on your daily commute you will be approached by a homeless person. If I have something to spare, I gladly give it up. (Honestly, the homeless are innocuous. It's really not as bad as people make it out to be. Frankly, I think the homelessness in Southern California is a lot worse. It's rampant there!)
To some, it's a chosen lifestyle.
I even heard of a guy who got into Columbia University and never paid for room and board. He just alternated between sleeping in the 24 hr library or on friends' couches. He saved himself virtually half of a $30,000 a year tuition. Smart or crazy? Either way, it was a chosen lifestyle.
(I'm still tryin' to figure out how he showered. Probably, at friend's houses. Or made use of the sports teams' showers.)
But I digress.
One event I did see recently on the train was a homeless guy doin' comedy...
He asserts, as he gets on a packed rush hour train, "I ain't homeless. You all are invading MY home."
Touché, homeless guy.
The train was jam-packed and for him to be doing a routine in a packed train was ballsy! In true New Yorker fashion, no one made eye contact with him.
He proceeded to tell his jokes, the chuckles growing from slow ebb to complete and full hearty guffaws. My jaw dropped! I was in awe. He didn't even make use of an "opener" to warm up the crowd. He made a train chock full of disgruntled, irked, ready-to-get-home-PRONTO! commuters laugh in 5-10 seconds. I was in the presence of comic genius! I wanted his autograph. And his number--eh, well...
I noticed it was his presence. He claimed the stage. He claimed his space. He wasn't mean about it--not territorial. He just knew himself. And he knew his audience. And he didn't swear or use obscenities once--a Seinfeld in-the-making.
He definitely had a "character"--the 'semi-angry-disturbed by the passengers homeless guy,' which he played well. I was envious. I'm still trying to build my character.
And I overheard a conversation between a Latino mother and her cute-as-can-be and highly precocious son.**
Son: He could make a fortune with those jokes
Mother: Well, he's homeless
Son: He should be on TV!! He had the whole train laughing!
I heard myself sighing in disbelief in response to the son's remark. I then looked over to the homeless man (who was still slaying the crowd) and found myself wanting to switch places with him. To grapple with a crowd like that and win out!
Do you know how hard it is to perform comedy in front of people who expect comedy to come out of your mouth versus a crowd who wants nothing to do with you or your comedy---a crowd that doesn't even want to look at you. This man still managed to get people to hand him money by the time the train reached the next stop. Insane! Insane!
Anyway, the kid was right. The next time I see the homeless guy I'm going to do a exposé on him--if he'll let me. Maybe we really can get him on TV.
I believe witnessing his performance was a sign that I should keep pursuing my dreams.
Man, you had to be there! (I'm so glad I was.)
**(I later found out he's 8 years old and starting school on his birthday, the next day. I wanted to steal the kid and take him home with me he was so cute.)
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Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Women in Comedy: Judy Tenuta
The inspiration for this post comes from you, "the reader." I realized that I kept getting hits from search engines for this comedienne--and I had no idea who she was. And since this blog is about learning about comedy just as much as it is about creating comedy, I figured it was about time for yet another, "Women in Comedy" post. Being the democrat that I am, today's post was chosen "for the people, by the people."
So here is my Wednesday Book Blog Report on Ms. Judy Tenuta.
Judy Tenuta made her "claim to fame" in the 80s, during the "stand-up comedy boom." She is the self-declared "Love Goddess" of comedy, as well as the "Aphrodite of the Accordion". (The latter of two titles stems from her stand-up comedy act, which she often performs with an accordion, perforating her routine with riffs.) She has since had her own HBO, Showtime, and Lifetime Specials, as well as been seen on every major talk show and even garnered herself a Diet Dr. Pepper Commercial deal.
I would describe her comedy character as the loud, ditzy, kitchsy, schticky, raunchy smartmouth type, complete with DayGlo colors. Obviously, the 80s was in full effect when she was "coming up."
I would say she reminds me of the following stand-up comedians:
- Pauly Shore (of 80s/90s MTV fame, whose parents founded the famous LA comedy club, The Comedy Store.)
- Julie Brown (of 80s MTV fame, perfected the "80s Valley Girl persona")
- Pee Wee Herman (Paul Reubens)
- Cindy Lauper (not a comedian, but you see the resemblance) (Plus, I love Lauper. If I could, I would devote an entire 5 blog posts to solely her.)
Back to Tenuta:
Now I don't want to go so far as to say that her material is "hack". But I know I could never do this type of comedy. It's just not my style. I don't like the cackle-y voice mixed with the semi-whiny brazen attitude. Frankly, she turns me off. But that's not to say that I can't learn something from her. And I'm sure if I met her, she would be cool to hang out with.
What is your opinion?
Other weird facts about Tenuta:
[ Judy Tenuta Official Website | Judy Tenuta MySpace | Judy Tenuta on Wikipedia | Interview with Judy Tenuta on her movie Desperation Blvd(1998) ]
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Tuesday, October 9, 2007
The Most Important Thing I learned from a Flamingo
Flamingos are graceful often over-looked creatures in nature. After all, we're only reminded of them when we see kitschy lawn decor or the intro to Miami Vice.
But this weekend I had a different response at the sight of a flamingo: I laughed. And it was then that I dwarfed in age. I found myself splayed on the cold kitchen floor, after a unsophisticated tumble out of the kitchen chair. It was at that moment I had flown back in time. I regressed into childhood--a time when we laughed so hard it didn't matter who was watching. The laughs came from the gut. And the slight pain that resurfaced each time we moved our small fragile waists, we were reminded of what put the pain there in the first place--the silly flamingo.
So the all-important lesson I learned from the Flamingo was to laugh again--the wholehearted, unabashed laugh. I hope you find the same joy I did. Enjoy your holiday! (Erm--I mean, post-holiday.) And leave a comment. I want to know I wasn't the only person who ended up in stitches on the floor.
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Monday, October 8, 2007
How to Win Black Friends and Influence People
Well, the easy answer to getting more black friends, like Stephen Colbert does, is to watch tonight's Season Premiere of THE BOONDOCKS.
For those of you unfamiliar, I did mention The Boondocks in a previous post on METABIGOTRY. And for those of you who were paying attention in class that day, you will get to see a prime example tonight at 11:30pm (EST), on Cartoon Network.
Yes, the Master of Racial Disaster Aaron McGruder is back on the TV with his seminal thought-provoking TV Cartoon show on Adult Swim.
[Here's a link to a 2005 ONION Interview with Aaron McGruder]
In the next season, we can expect to see some old characters like the fictional rapper Thugnificent
And welcome some new celebrity voices:
For those of you who have the resources (Cartoon Network), I'm going to ask this of you--- a homework assignment.
Here's your assignment:
1) Watch tonight's episode of The Boondocks.
2) Bring a notepad and take notes. (Yes, I mean it! Write down what you liked, what bothered you, what you found disturbing, what you learned, etc.)
3) Come back and comment here on this post. I really want to hear what people think about the way McGruder addresses issues at hand. (Did you like it? Did you hate it? What would you like to see changed?) Because your reactions will directly help with my comedy. Maybe I can change, add, or expand on something that McGruder didn't.
Thanks for your participation. I'll see you back in class tomorrow!
And then you'll be well on your way to winning black friends and influencing people! The Black Dale Carnegie would be proud!
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Thursday, October 4, 2007
Tina Fey and Jerry Seinfeld--Improv and Stand-up Collide...!
Two TITANS will clash tonight on NBC!!
That's right--Fey and Seinfeld!
Two schools of thought (on comedy) become one tonight on television. And I'm going to be right there, glued to my seat. My two favorite people in comedy on TV, on one channel. (I don't even have to flip back and forth between stations to catch all the comedy goodness!)
One Rock... Two Rock... 30 Rock...
Ok..ok... maybe I'm over-hyping it. But they're both awesome in their own right. They both have cool, "before they made it" stories.
Tina Fey has her background in Second City in Chicago. She was so motivated and ready for the Improv and Sketch world that she up and left Pennsylvania for the big city.
Seinfeld didn't to travel too far for his training ground--just a hop, skip, and jump over the Long Island Expressway.
Another cool celebrity factoid: Seinfeld and Alec Baldwin, a main character on 30 Rock, both grew up in the same town. (Man, Hollywood is small!!!) They weren't exactly friends, however Seinfeld did know Baldwin's father who was a football coach at Seinfeld's high school.
So let's review: What happens at 8:30pm (EST) tonight on NBC?
Answer: Two powerhouse comedians go head to head.
Tonight 30 Rock Premiere
Spoiler warning: If you really can't wait until 8:30 tonight, then I can offer you this link, but don't say I didn't warn you!
And Jerry has even a shameless plug for his new movie, Bee Movie. And I can only respond, in Seinfeld's own voice, we get it,we get it already!
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Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Another great reason to LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF!!!
Check out this video before it goes away, for two reasons:
1) Because it's DAMN hilarious
2) Because he talks about a chick named, Lucy. How cool is that?
Oh, and the blog owner... he used to do Stand-up! Even MORE reason to check it out...
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Monday, October 1, 2007
Interview with blogger East Village Idiot (Part 5 of 5)
Quest: So you work in advertising. Do you think the industry affects your sense of humor or perhaps what you blog about?
Chris: I think it restricts what I blog about. I don't specifically blog about what I do. I don't write too much about my worklife. The people I work with know I have a blog and some of them read my blog. I don't want to impose on them, or paint a bad image of myself or my company on my blog.
Quest: What about industry specific? Blogging about the advertising industry?
Chris: I ranted a few weeks ago about an ad that's actually made for one of the clients at our firm. We didn't create the ad. I won't point it out. I don't know if I really should really say this. But I had to say something about it because it was driving me nuts. I take a laymen's perspective of advertising on my blog. I don't necessarily utilize the fact that I have experience in the industry. I'll leave that to the professionals. Like, have you ever read Copyranter?
Quest: Copyranter? No, but I have see ad...ad....?
Chris: AdRants? There's a site called Adrants. The Copyranter--I wouldn't say he's grizzled, but he's definitely a disgruntled copywriter who rants about some of the crap that he sees in advertising. And occasionally stuff he likes, but mostly its stuff he hates.
Quest: What about the AMC original series, Mad Men?
Chris: Oh, I love that show!
Quest: Never seen it. I've only seen the advertisements!
Chris: It's hilarious because it's not too far-fetched to think that the Ad Industry was totally full of sexual harassment and blatantly out in the open at that time. When I was in school, we reading about advertising ---learning about advertising--we read books about what the ad industry was like in the 60s. Doing Liquid lunches. Smoke in your office.
Although I did have one co-worker who smoked in her office.
Quest: Liquid lunches?
Chris: Drinking on the job.
Quest: When did the blogging bug bite? When you came back from Vermont?
Chris: I was blogging while I was still up there. But the purpose was not to blog obsessively. I think it was when I got that first wave of attention--it was like, "BoOM, wow, this is kinda fun. Maybe I should do this more often." That was about a year and a half ago. It just took off from there. I think that was about the time I started posting every single day. And then it became multiple times a day. Usually, I try for twice a day.
Quest: What about weekends?
Chris: Weekends I take off. No one reads on the weekends! I'm serious. If you look at my traffic, there's a little dip every weekend--Saturday and Sunday. I've probably done myself a disservice by not posting anything on weekends. Because even if they are online over the weekend, they probably think, "Oh, he doesn't post anything new." Like I said, I write on the weekends. I store material for the week ahead. I don't post on weekends. Weekends are my down time.I don't need to be obsessed with my blog on weekends. During the week, I'll check my time, statistics. I'll check my email like four or five times a day.
Quest: Why did you start?
Chris: I started to keep my friends updated on what's going on in my life. It was a fluke that it took off and became anything other than that. If you look back at my archives, to the very beginning. It was stuff like, "I went out with my friends for a mutual friend's birthday. Here are some pictures of us falling over."
There were actually very few pictures of me on my blog. The one's that I do have are hard to find. I was never someone who has wanted to be stopped on the street. That hasn't happened although I have run into a fan by accident. And this kind of freaked me out.
I got invited to this party associated with this website. Most of the people who were there were users of the site. I hadn't used the site, but they tried to get me to use the site. So I was sitting around with a bunch of people who were users of the site.
So they said to me, "Why are you here?"
I responded, "I write a blog."
"Oh really? What blog do you writer?"
"The East Village Idiot."
And right after I said that, this one guy at the table jumped out of his seat. "OMG! You're the East Village Idiot!?! I read your blog everyday."
I was like, "Whoa!" That was the moment when I realized that maybe this is something bigger than I thought.
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Thursday, September 27, 2007
Interview with blogger East Village Idiot (Part 4 of many)
[To read Part 1, Part 2, or Part 3 of this interview. ]
Quest: So why were you an idiot for moving to Vermont from New York City? It sounds like you had a lot of fun in Vermont.
Chris: Okay, I had fun there, but I came right back to the city. I had to ask myself, "Why did I do this?" And here's why I'm an idiot: I wasted so much money moving up there. I had to buy a car. And then I had to sell the car and take the loss on it. I took a salary cut to move up there to take the job. Because then cost of living is less. "Oh wait! But I have to have a car which will basically reduce my cost of living." So then it ended up being the exactly the same.
Living up there I was pretty much the only person who was 24 years old and single and employed. Cause everyone else moving up there was as a hippie--OMG, The damn dirty hippies-- or a hick.
I think the funniest thing was that I moved to Vermont being a dyed-in-the-wool New England liberal, and left Vermont so frustrated by the crazy hippies there that I definitely became a lot more conservative than I was before I moved up there.
The Hippies were like, "No we don't want this drug store here because drug stores are bad."
I say, "You medicate yourself your way. Let me medicate myself my way."
It was absolutely absurd. It was just bizarre. I rolled my eyes so much there.
And Oh my god everyone drives so slowly up there. On a road where the speed limit's like 55 and they'll travel at 35. It'll be on a two lane road and you're stuck behind them for 20 miles without a passing zone. "OMG I just want to get home!"
Quest: But where are they going? Not everyone is driving to work. There shouldn't be any rush hour traffic.
Chris: Burlington is a pretty condensed city, but the State of Vermont is incredibly rural. Basically, outside of Burlington vermont, it's pretty much like Alabama--in so many ways. Outside of burlington, Vermont is pretty much like alabama only much, much, whiter.
Burlington is frigid. It was so cold during the winter. I used to walk to work because I lived downtown and worked downtown. (It was my small attempt at bringing a piece of New York City with me to Vermont.) So one week we had a string of ridiculously cold days. The high temperature was below zero--the high was below zero.
And then one day, I stepped outside my door and it was sunny and it was clear and there was no wind. It was absolutely beautiful outside. The sun was shining. You could see across the lake--the mountains on the Adirondacks are on the other side. I unzipped coat. I took off my hat. I took off my scarf. I was like, "Oh, this is so great!!"
And so I walk into our office and the receptionist is there. And I turn to her and say, "It's a beautiful day out there today."
She responds cheery, "Yeah, it's 5!"
And she was right. It was five degrees. When it's minus 15 degrees every morning for a week straight, 5 feels warm. It's like it being 20 degrees for a week and then it's 40.
Quest: Wow, that's Canadian weather!
Chris: We were practically in Canada. There are parts of Canada that are further south than Burlington, VT.
Quest: Isn't Montreal nearby?
Chris: Uh huh.
Quest: How close is Montreal?
Chris: About an hour and 15 mins away. It was nice. I used to go up there a lot. Actually I used to shop at IKEA. Here's the problem with going to IKEA in Quebec, specifically.
You see like a little gadget. It's a Swedish name and there's no real description of what it is. Or there's a description, but it's not really clear what you can actually do with this thing. Imagine having all those descriptions in french.
Quest: It's supposed to be bilingual. The national languages are french and english.
Chris: Oh, no! It's barely bilingual. Honestly, if you were driving through some parts of Quebec and your car broke down and you had to pull over and need help. You might not find someone who speaks english. There are certain enclaves in Quebec that are strictly french speaking.
I went to a French-Canadian McDonald's inside a French-Canadian Walmart. It was the two most American things you could ever do in Québec. It was so weird. It was like walking into this alternate dimension, where everything looks the same except it's in French.
As you cross the border, if you have Vermont plates on your car, they're pretty lenient. Occasionally, you have to pop your trunk on the way back.
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Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Interview with blogger East Village Idiot (Part 3 of many)
[To read Part 1 or Part 2 of this interview. ]
Quest: What is the line of demarcation, in years, where a person can officially say he/she's a New Yorker?
Chris: Well, this is a tough question. I moved to New York right after college and lived here for about a year and a half, left and then came back. So I've been here about 3 and a half years now, total. I'm feeling more and more like one everyday.
I am really bothered by native New Yorkers who say, "If you didn't grow up here you can never be a true New Yorker."
And I say in response, "Excuse me." All right, to a certain extent, yeah. I'll never know what it's like to have gone to high school here or something. But how does that make me less of a New Yorker than you. You're still going through the same experiences that I'm going through on a daily basis. I've put up with it for the 3.5 years. And if you're my age and you went to college and are coming back you've probably been through it for 3.5 years, too! So, I think the whole concept is kind of ridiculous. When you first move to the city and you know nothing about it--that's one thing. I've taken the time and I've definitely passed that learning curve.
Quest: Which is how long?
Chris: I hesitate to put a number on it. (pause) You work to get to know the city. I'm one of those people who will explore the outer regions of Brooklyn and Queens. I will gladly go to the Bronx. I've been to Staten Island. I bet there are many New Yorkers who have never been to Staten Island. I can guarantee you that! Although there are also New Yorkers who truly believe that Staten Island is not a part of New York. I concur because I've been there.
How about this? The day you become a true New Yorker is the day that you're willing to openly berate someone for doing something that frustrates you in public.
Quest: Get out! You've done that?
Chris: Oh, absolutely! I have verbalized my frustration at people before. Actually, it was on the 1st Ave subway station one morning. This girl had a large backpack she was wearing. And she was standing on the platform--the platform was really crowded waiting for the L-train.
This commuter says to her, "It's too crowded for you to be wearing that thing in here!"
She says in response, "If you don't like it, you take a cab!"
He says, "Well, you're the one who has a big bag. You should go and take a cab!"
So I say to the guy, "Why don't you f*ckin' stop judging people and go take a cab"
The girl turns to me and says, "Thank you."
There are days when the frustration level reaches a peak and I can't deal with it anymore. So, I'm going to say something.
On a crowded subway, you know you're not going to get beaten up for voicing your opinion because there are fifty other people around you.
Quest: You seem to have strong sentiments towards the city. Was that always apparent? Were you always a city boy?
Chris: When I was a little kid and even up to the age of twenty, I always said, "I'll never live in New York city. I hate New York city. I hate big cities, in general. You can't even get me to live in downtown Boston."
And now look at a me! I'm living in Manhattan of all places--everything I feared about New York has come to life. It was just an irrational fear. I think it was fear of the unknown. And then I was immediately in love with the city.
Not even the day I moved here, but the day I came here to start looking at apartments. I remember asking myself, "Why did I ever think twice?" And just think, if I hadn't come to that realization, I could be in Boise, Idaho, right now. So I'm grateful for that.
Quest: I'm sure many of your readers are grateful, too! (pause) But what about New York city makes people stay? There's definitely a camaraderie I think is apparent that most tourists miss out on.
Chris: Yeah, definitely. The thing about New York that the denizens get to experience is the community aspect of it all. People look after each other here. Just a month into my moving into the city, was the blackout in August 2003. Things in New York were kinda crazy. Everyone was kinda freaking out a little bit.
I helped this girl who was completely lost. She was in a tizzy when she approached me and lists off her predicament: "The subways aren't running. I can't catch a cab. I don't know how I'm going to get home."
So I said, "Walk with me. You're walking in the right direction."
I got to my apartment, went upstairs got her a map, gave it her, and highlighted the route for her to get home.
The second act of kindness during the blackout I witnessed was where this guy had a fainted on the Queensboro bridge. (I walked over the Queensboro to get back to Brooklyn, which seems counter productive but I was living in Greenpoint then. It wasn't that far out of the way.)
So this guy passed out on the bridge. And everyone was freaking out. It's literally in the middle of the bridge. There was no way we could carry him all the way across the bridge. There were cars on the bridge, but they weren't moving because they were just enveloped with pedestrians, who were also walking across the bridge. So twenty people flagged down a Fed-Ex truck, cleared the way, put the guy on the truck, ran down the bridge alongside the truck, moving people aside to get the truck across the bridge. New Yorkers actually looking out for others in times of crisis? It happens.
Quest: So what's the connection to Vermont?
Chris: This is a funny story. Here's the theme: I'm an idiot.
Quest: ...as it says in your title of your blog.
Chris: Except it's not just the title of my blog. Here's what happened: When I was living in New York. It was a really hot summer, the second summer I lived here. I was like, "I can't stand the heat. I can't stand the crowds. I can't stand this city anymore. I have to get out!!!"
Quest: You had a breakdown.
Chris: I just had a complete breakdown. I'm just like, "I cannot deal with this anymore. I hate slow pedestrians. I hate how stuffy the subway is. Bad example, but I was like, "I hate waiting 25 mins for the G train." (That was my own damned fault for deciding to live in Greenpoint.)
So I was like, "That's it--I'm moving!" I took a job at an ad agency in Burlington, Vermont and moved up there. I lived up there for two winters. Skiied the heck out of those winters--had probably the greatest summer of my life. You remember the Seinfeld episode, The Summer of George? The summer I lived up there was The Summer of Chris. I was on a boat every weekend, out on the lake or hiking, kayaking. I was swimming in swimming holes...
And then I realized: "I am sooo bored up here."
Think about it. There 40,000 people living in Burlington, VT.
And then there are 40,000 people living in a 10 block radius of this pizza place. There are 40,000 people in Burlington and it's the largest city in the state!!!
I realized that I have to come back to the city.
[ Part 4 of this interview can be found here
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